Alex Goy drives a Skoda Superb Sleeper…and loves it
There are times when you just know that someone’s boredom has become the rest of the world’s gain. The Skoda Superb Sleeper is one of those times. There’s no reason for it to exist, there will only ever be one of them, and only a handful of people will really know what it is.
Skoda, as it occasionally likes to do, has decided to build something silly. The last time it did that, it made an Octavia for the Bonneville Salt Flats and set a land speed record for 2.0-litre forced induction cars at a 227.080mph average. There was a good reason for it… probably, but the reality is: Skoda made a cool thing for fun, and it was awesome. It’s gone and done it again.
How the Superb Sleeper was born
The Superb Sleeper was officially made to celebrate the third-generation Superb’s successes - over 860,000 of ‘em were sold, so it’s a good enough excuse. Those big numbers aren’t a huge surprise - it was a brilliant package: Big space, big spec, big comfort, small(ish) outlay, cracking drive, plenty of engine options. Where the clichés go to BMW/Merc/Audi/Insert posh motor here, the smart money goes to Skoda, right? You could have all sorts of engine configurations, too, including a 276hp all wheel drive hot one. This is where the Sleeper’s story begins.
Superb Sleeper Engine
If you’re going to build a mental Skoda, there’s one place to go: RE Performance. They’re the same mob that made the Bonneville Octavia, and the bread and butter over there is making supercars even more super. They’re engineers with a penchant for speed, and will stop at nothing to make it happen. And, friends, they went all out on this thing.
For number fiends, here’s the top line - the 2.0-litre turbocharged Superb Sleeper has 477bhp and 488lb ft, can get from 0-62mph in 4.5 seconds (ish), and can hit the fun side of 180mph. That’s… a lot. This has been achieved with a new intercooler, intake, and a pleasingly chunky Garrett PowerMax Turbo. Also some magic that only RE Performance knows - a ‘make big green car lairy as sin’ incantation that requires spanners, a special dance, and a coolant sacrifice. Probably.
Going covered, RE Performance also threw a set of AP Racing brakes front and rear to cover stopping, and some K&W Coilovers to help cornering (and drop the ride height by 50mm). It’s a lot. But it doesn’t look it. The only way you’ll know the Sleeper is the Sleeper is if you spot its bright red brake calipers and clock that there’s chuff all clearance between tyre and arch. Otherwise it’s just a car doing car things.
There’s no big badge on the back that says ‘LOOK AT ME,’ no spoiler, no needless pointy bits to make the bubblegum vape kids green with envy.
Interior
Inside is standard Superb - very well appointed, with CarPlay and a decent stereo. The seats are comfy and can be both heated and cooled. Honestly, if your dad turned up to lunch in it, you’d think he’s gone and bought a sensible car to gently swoosh from thing to thing as inoffensively as possible. It’s got a brown leather interior for pete’s sake, nothing with a brown interior could be REMOTELY spicy, right? It’s got hooks in the boot to hang your shopping on, so it doesn’t roll around. Why would it be able to do 180mph?
There is, however, another, small, giveaway that it might not be all that standard: it makes a good ‘ol noise when you start it up. Ok, a 2.0-litre turbo four is never going to be as sonorous as a V8 and the like, but the Sleeper can PLAY its pipes. From the inside it’s a bassy woofle, from the outside, anyone nearby will wonder where the thunder is. A good start, but it gets better.
Out on the road
Set the air con to ‘just so,’ have your hind heated on one of three settings, and pop it into drive to begin your trip in comfort. It’s not aggressive or bitey from the get-go. It’s still a Skoda, remember, it’s just got an ON Cloudrunner at each corner and a keen interest in rocketry. You can drive it as normally as you like and it works like a regular Superb. Ok, for something so much grunt you’d expect a bit more from the bottom end of the rev range, but it’s hardly gutless. The ride’s a little less forgiving as well. That’s for good reason.
The Sleeper is best explored outside of town, where people think they can overtake and not get a big green surprise in return. On the highway it cruises happily, and burbles gently around, but if someone has the audacity to try to put the ‘boring’ Skoda in its place, a quick ankle flick will kick the seven-speed DSG down a few, pop the revs above 4,000rpm, and all of a sudden your world goes backwards, which, one assumes, is quite a surprise for those around you.
Similarly, on twisty roads, it’s hilarious fun to play around in. 4x4 grip means you’d have to do something rather silly to get unstuck, so you can push it around corners rather quickly if the mood takes you. Above the magic 4k rpm mark, there are gorgeous amounts of shove that seem… endless. It just keeps going and going, the car leaps from gear to gear to make sure the fun doesn’t stop. Thankfully, when you do need to stop, those AP Racing brakes are mighty effective and feel great under your foot.
Cornering is pleasingly flat due to the new springs - you don’t get the impression that pushing on will end with you on your roof. The steering isn’t quite as pointy as the rest of the car, but when you’re having as much fun as you can have in something so unassuming, that doesn’t really matter.
The one slight problem…
The whole thing is truly excellent. There’s no sense behind its existence, no reason for it other than ‘let’s build a cool thing, yeah?’ More people should be able to experience it, but that ain’t gonna happen. This is one of one, and always will be. Skoda, surely, has a proper reason on paper, but a pre-school educated guess goes thus: no one would actually buy it.
They say they would, because everyone on the internet tells the truth, but sales numbers wouldn’t match up. The amount of time and money it’d take to make these things do their thing properly to a warranty-able standard would add huge chunks of cash to the entry fee, which would likely put it in Audi RS 4/BMW M3 Touring territory. And when it comes to Skoda vs an M3, who do you think’s gonna win? The business case isn’t sustainable.
If you do want a quick Superb, there are plenty of used 280hp estates out there, and RE Performance is just a phone call away. Let us know when you’ve built it, though, yeah? We’d love another go.
words: Alex Goy
pictures: Skoda
